I wasn't always this open about it, and willing to let the world know that dyslexia is a part of who I am. There is still a lot of stigma and misunderstanding about dyslexia, concerns about what peers, or employers might think. In my teens I was really worried about other students finding out I was dyslexic and saying insensitive things about it. I wanted to be like everyone else, and to just blend in.
Gradually, I began to feel more confident in myself, and I wanted to find out more about how my dyslexia affected me, and what I could do to help myself deal with my difficulties. I read my first dyslexia assessment, and looked up information online, I bought books recommended by the educational psychologist I had seen. I was really shocked to find despite increased awareness about dyslexia that large numbers of dyslexic people were still ending up in the prison system, it wasn't a mandatory part of teacher training, and if you didn't have a parent who was informed enough to fight for your right to an education, you were unlikely to get any support at all.
There are huge injustices related to dyslexia, and what are relatively minor difficulties and differences. That these remain is due to a lack of willingness to make relatively minor changes to the education system, and to an unwillingness within society to fully come to terms with what dyslexia means for real people, because it challenges preconceptions about the nature of intelligence.
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| Me, as a little girl in my school uniform. I used to be embarrassed by my front teeth, so I used to try to hide them when I smiled. |
People acted like they couldn't see us, and issues affecting us and our families were not priorities. I wanted to be seen, listened to. I didn't want any other child to have the negative school experiences I did growing up. When I was very little I used to wonder why with so many influential and successful dyslexics children like me were still not being properly supported, suffering emotionally, as well as not being properly educated. I used to wonder why those celebrities weren't doing more, weren't screaming about what a travesty it was on the television, or doing anything visible to me to change things. I decided if I ever got any sort of influence or did well I was going to do whatever I could to make things better. I wanted to be part of the solution.
Getting older, I realised it was unlikely I'd ever be a big house hold name, and I can't say it's something I aspire to, but I could still take steps towards making things better for others like myself, and for future generations. I became a member of the BDA, although none of the information I received seemed geared towards me (a 17 year old dyslexic), but mainly for parents of little kids, or professionals working in the industry, I wanted to support what they were doing. I volunteered to support kids with special needs as a mentor at my school, and later I began trying to support people via the being dyslexic forums, where I am now a moderator. I did this in my free time all through University.
The lack of provision or conversation about dyslexic teenagers and adults troubled me. I came up with the idea for some sort of online magazine for teens, or students. Over time this idea developed into Dysbooks, as I realised there was also support missing regarding helping dyslexic people enjoy literature, yet a glut of organisations and individuals selling support with acquiring literacy - No one was following through to the next stage, as if once we could read, that was the end of the story. There was very little celebrating achievements with literature, and little supporting parents, or teacher regarding the best books for them, or for dyslexic kids. Being a dyslexic bookworm with an English degree, and working at the time as a Bookseller, I felt I was well placed to produce much needed information, and to highlight great information or projects by others in one place.
I decided in my daily life, while I wasn't going to pin a badge to my chest and declare it to everyone I met, I was not going to keep dyslexia my dirty little secret, or cover up the work I was doing trying to help dyslexic people, as if it was shameful, or should reflect on me badly. If I didn't want it to feel shameful, and for people to know what dyslexia and dyslexics were really like, then I decided it would take lots of ordinary dyslexic people like me, as well as celebrities, being brave enough to come out as dyslexic. To be totally open and unapologetic about who we are, and to expect to be treated with respect, and equality.
It is very much a personal choice to disclose, and I fully respect other people's decision regarding disclosure. However, this is why I have made this choice, this is why I don't pretend to be something I am not, I don't stay quite, or cover my tracks in case potential employers or others find out. It might not always be easy while ignorance and negative sentiment still exists, but it's not going to change unless people like me do something about it, and demand that change.
I am open about my dyslexia so other people can be. I want to create the change I believe in.
It took me 50 plus years to be able to look for the answers to my writing issues....specifically spelling. Congratulations on knowing it's a big deal emotionally. I work with clients to release the kind of emotions that keep pushed down and I think so many have these issues and don't know it is a condition not who they are. I appreciate your desire to get the word out so people understand they are not Dyslexic they have the challenge and the gifts of Dyslexia.
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